I placed an ad last week on Craigslist to rent out one of my apartments that is empty. Amy and I bet on how many responses there would be to the ad. We decided on an over/under of 20. Amy took over, I took under. 25 people responded before I pulled the ad. I won't tell you what Amy won, but she was pretty happy with her prize.
This was the funniest response I got:
I'm interested in renting your studio. Please email me short or one-word
answers or call me at xxx-xxx-xxxx (Call xxx-xxx-xxxx from 8/7 to
8/10). My phone blocks all outgoing toll calls but can receive any call.
Appreciate!
Since I can't view and take measurements myself ( not in Baltimore
till mid August), could you kindly provide such crucial info to me? In
that way I won't need to bother you with viewing and will not delay
the renting process.
Once you provide the needed info, I can seal the deal.
Full address w/ zipcode?
House on slope?
Proximity to cemetery or mortuary?
Age of bldg?
Type of housing: Single house? Rowhouse? Multiple-unit bldg? Secured
apt. bldg?
Date last renovated: Kitchen? Bath?
Floor? Walls?
Square footage of apartment ?
Flooring of kitchen? Of bathroom?
Total # of floors?
Which level is unit on?
Avaib: Mid-size self defrosting fridge?
Microwave? Air-
conditioner? Modern tub?
Window covering? Wardrobe closet ?
Measurement of wardrobe closet(s)?
Of kitchen sink ?
Of bathroom sink ?
Of height of ceiling?
How many minutes to walk to nearest JH hospital shuttle bus stop?
Walk to large supermarket?
Any safety precautions (iron gate, alarm, surveillance camera, window
bars etc)
Lease requirement?
Move in from Aug 18th possible?
What does rent $600 include?
Pls send a picture of each room.
I thought the question "Proximity to cemetery or mortuary?" most intriguing. Would that be a good thing or bad? I would think dead people would make great neighbors. Quiet, trouble free. But I suppose someone might think otherwise. I thought about emailing that the house was haunted, and other joke answers. But I decided it wasn't worth the time, and answered the email with zero words.
Monday, August 11, 2008
In One Word or Less
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
I can see where a lot of the questions would make sense but that cemetery/mortuary question really does just come in from out of nowhere.
A good friend of mine has a few low cost rentals in Durham and I've had a chance to watch & hear about all the 'challenges' of being a landlord. Wow - the actual details involved are so much more than I'd imagined. You really do have to 'work' for those rental dollars.
I was also thinking that with the cemetery question she was just thinking ahead. Maybe she was planning on spending the rest of her life in the apartment and wanted to make sure it would be a short trip to her final destination.
Landlording would be a lot more work if I bothered responding to such emails. I agree that some of the questions are reasonable. It was more the general tone of the email that put me off. Does she really think I'm going to measure the sink for her? Also, a lot of the information, including pictures of the apartment, was included in the ad.
Other information she should be able to figure out herself. How the hell do I know how far away the JHU shuttle is? I'm not a JHU student. The cross streets for the apartment location are part of the google ad. If she can't figure that out herself, I expect that she isn't going to be able to figure out a lot of things, and is going to be a high maintenance tenant.
Anyway, I'm lucky that the apartment is in a popular location and I get plenty of inquiries about it. I can afford to be choosey about tenants.
Scott,
Interesting questions. Ok she needed the sink size to butcher her B/F or spouse in. And if fact was it really a Woman that emailed you? Hmmm, my never trusting mind can dream up some stuff that would rival some shows on TV.
Like maybe this person was some type of sicko that wanted to use your apt as a base of operations for committing some unspeakable acts. Think about it. Distance to Cemetery (maybe this person wanted to bury the person there). Distance to college (what better place to find victims). Type of flooring (must be a real bitch getting blood out of porous ceramic tile). What level is it on (carrying dead bodies is another bitch). you get the point, those questions do not seem to be the questions of a sane mind.
Scott, you might have just saved the police a great deal off work by forcing this person to go elsewhere. Or maybe I have just been watching too much late night TV? You be the judge.
Lou, you need to find some way to quiet that active mind of yours.
Post a Comment